I want to start off by recognizing that I am lucky to have a job, and one that I don’t hate at that. I’ve had jobs that I’ve hated in the past, where I woke up and dreaded the thought of spending the day at work. Jobs where every night I had to make a pit stop for a drink or two to unwind. I’ve had jobs where the very thought of it made me sick. Of course it didn’t start out that way. Most of my jobs I had for several years. I stayed because although I had minor gripes I was generally happy. I am a quick learner and usually progressed very quickly. Eventually, that progressed stopped and everyday started feeling exactly the same. Out of frustration, I became discouraged and thought any effort I put into work wasn’t appreciated. I also didn’t really have a passion for the work that I was doing.
This was part of my motivation for going back to school. I always planned on writing but fell back on my early administrative and accounting experience to pay the bills. Eventually, I began taking steps to transition careers and thought a degree would help. While in school I ended up working in the business office of the college. While I was in school it worked out great and it was only supposed to be temporary. After graduation, my main goal was to find a full-time job and pay off the debt I had built up during the years of school. So last year when a coworker decided to retire and I was offered her position, I figured I should take it. I hadn’t had much luck finding anything else since graduation.
My goal was to pay off my bills as fast as possible so I wouldn’t have to worry as much about money. This way I would be open to taking a position based more on the fit instead of the salary. However, I have noticed a huge amount of slacking off on my job search. Not only do I not have the energy or time to commit myself to job hunting, I’ve noticed myself being picky about the jobs I apply for. I rationalize it by thinking why should I leave somewhere I’m generally happy at for anything less than the perfect job. So instead I’ve been sticking it out while not taking any risk to find something better. I’m think I’m holding on to this job because I’m just too comfortable. After almost four years, I’ve proven my hard work ethics and have developed a friendly relationship with coworkers and bosses. However, I have bad days where I feel over worked, stressed or even bored. I have started seeing the warning signs that I missed in the past that got me to the point where I didn’t care anymore. I also realize the longer I stay the harder it will be to leave. At some point, I may begin to hate it, maybe out of boredom or simply because I’ll get stuck and not fulfill my plans.
I’m feel stuck the only way to move forward is to leave my comfortable job. Somehow I have to create that sense of urgency I’ve had in the past when job hunting. At times I found a job within weeks of starting my search. If I really want to move on with my new career I have to take a risk and quit whether I have a new job or not. The only question now is how and when?